I am sitting in my friend's fwb's living room, sitting on the sofa I will use as my bed tonight. This place has a big window that faces the ocean, right where his ship is floating. There he is, serving his country abroad, the great axis, the majestic military power of America. And here I am, sitting like an old rotten depressed apple, starting to get some mold. I do not even know what I am writing tbh, I just do. I just finished my crying session. I came a long way (3 hours, to be exact) to this city just for him to turn his airplane mode on, not wanting to see me. Pathetic, I know. But here I am writing, with overwhelming feelings; disappointment, regret, anger, shame, and brainlessness. My parents called right when I was on the train, angry, because I have been ignoring them and the people that have helped me to be the person I am, meanwhile, here I am, pursuing people that do not even care about me. I do not even understand myself anymore, I hate myself, in fact. How could ...